Pig In The City

Even when Jean and I first started having kids, we thought it was important to maintain our ‘date night’ once or twice a month.

When Zach was 2 we had one of these date nights and when we returned to our apartment at about 11:00 PM, Jean said she’d take the babysitter home because I was very tired. I had already fallen asleep when I heard Jean screaming, “Bruce, you have to come here to see this!”

pigOf course I was skeptical. How could there be anything worth me getting out of bed to see this late at night?

I put my clothes back on and walked down the stairs to find Jean and some other guy looking at a small pig in the parking lot.

We were living in San Antonio, Texas, the 10th largest city in the United States. We purposefully left the farm years earlier, but here was a pig in middle of our parking lot!

Not really knowing what to do, I decided to chase the pig (I was probably not fully awake.) After chasing the pig around the corner of the apartment building, I finally had it cornered. With nothing else to do I picked it up.

If you’ve ever tried to pick up a pig, you’ve probably experienced this. They don’t go quietly.

This little pig started squealing. It squealed long and loud. I remember thinking that this pig squealing sounded like a woman was being murdered. I looked at Jean and the other guy as if they knew what I should do, but they didn’t.

After walking a few feet, I had enough of the squealing and I put the pig down. It ran back around to the front of the building where something even more unbelievable happened.

A man in Dickie pants and knee-high rubbers (boots) appeared. Not really knowing how to respond, I asked him, “is this your pig?” He never acknowledged me, but instead pointed his finger at the pig and said, “Where have you been? I can’t turn my back on you for a minute without you wandering off.” He then turned and started walking away, and I swear the pig put his nose down as if he was feeling ashamed and he followed this guy.

The young man walked to a pickup truck, which I recall looking like a ’49 Chevy which was also completely out of place (this would have been 1992.) Then he opened the door and the pig jumped in!

This whole experience was completely bizarre. Did it really happen? I saw it with my own eyes, but when we told our friends about the ordeal, we were met with understandable disbelief.

About 6 months later Jean and I went to the apartment complex pool with Zach. As we arrived, we saw another young couple there. When the man in this couple saw us, he screamed, “There they are, that’s them!” He told his wife that we were the two who also witnessed the pig in the city that night. He said to us, “Tell her it’s true! Tell her about the pig! She doesn’t believe me!”

We told her, but I still don’t think she believed us.

This is one of the first of about 500 family stories I promised my kids I’d write down sometime.

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